Redefining interesting

Did you look at the links I left up He enquired...

To be honest one hadn't looked at anything except the inside of the cupboard since coming home. There was a shocking migraine you see and one small slave was peering in it in the desperate hope that there might be some rich source of carbohydrates that were safe to eat. When the tummy is roiling all it wants is toast. It is something that one can no longer oblige it with due to that little gluten issue.

Makes small note to self; brown rice is repellent to both the nose and the stomach when having a migraine L

I thought the immobilisers were interesting He carried on, rolling over one's disinterest.

So after making Him breakfast and lunch one snuck a peek on the way to bed. Umm... what sort of depraved mind would come up with these?And why does He always manage to find this stuff?

Prays quietly to any saint that looks after small slaves that they do not find their way to our tiny domicile...

No good is going to come of those L

Well we know what assume does

Bending over the kitchen bench... can't remember why exactly, but in hindsight it does seem a foolish choice of positions... one small slave was pinned down by an arm, as He pounced from nowhere. His free hand rained fiery blows upon the upturned arse until there were squeaks and squeals and rather a lot of squirming.

What was that for one enquired in an aggrieved tone

Well you assumed the position, He replied with a smirk

Only in your mind and your mind is a sick, fucked up place... said as there was some furious rubbing going on

My mind, He retorted with total equanimity, is the only mind that matters

Sighs hate it when He might have a point L

Opportunistic bastard! 

Small mercies

Did you like the picture of the paddle I left up He enquired, as one pottered around the kitchen.

Um... that wasn't a paddle. That was a nasty looking boar bristle brush. It was a hair brush that came with its own cleaning system. Something that did make one wonder quietly if it would clean off epithelial cells... not that one said that thought out loud.

It's a paddle He asserted. They have probably been used like that for centuries...

There was a little mime of someone bent over His knee and being walloped. The whole thing was a bit too graphic for one small slave who had gravitated from the kitchen to the study. In fact one backed out quite smartly... before the pantomime became a live demo.

It's a hair brush

It's a paddle He argued. It would be perfect

Frankly at nearly two hundred dollars... it was on sale from its normal price of over three hundred dollars... one can't help but think that it should come with someone to do the job as well. Besides one small slave's arse doesn't deserve such riches...

Honest... beams quietly

From the experimental kitchen

For the record there is a reason why all recipes for quinoa porridge have added things like fruit, spices, nuts and anything else that can be added to food. Quinoa might be a super food that is rich in protein and contain all nine amino acids, but it tastes like mown grass. In fact without a little vanilla bean extracts it tastes vile... even raisins alone couldn't save it.

On the other hand rice pudding made with brown rice and no extra sugar is as yummy as predicted. Of course it is hardly a fast breakfast and in fact has to be made before hand; otherwise one would never get out the door to work. Not that the idea causes as much emotional distress as you would think...

Wonders idly if breakfast took too long to cook is a valid reason for not showing up.

Conduct unbecoming

We were driving to dinner and His finger slowly inched up the leg. Under the dress and along the inner thigh it slid. Inch by inch it crept until it finally reached its destination. There was a gasp of disbelief.

You're not wearing any underpants He exclaimed in mock surprise.

There isn't enough room in this dress for oneself and underpants.

Mutters it is very form fitting and clingy and who wants a VPL?

Oh and while we are on the topic of that dress. When a girl, who is 162.5 cm (barely 5.3 and a bit), is peering up into her shoe cupboard going there is a pair of royal blue pumps in here somewhere, while uttering plaintive cries of help, sitting in your chair laughing, while watching her feeble attempts to reach them, is not very gentlemanly either. 

The downside of warmer weather

As one has mentioned before, the weather here is cranking up to bypass spring altogether. A flow on effect of all this warmth is the dispensing of clothes... not that it really takes much encouragement. Honestly for a girl so invested in her wardrobe one has a hearty loathing of actually wearing things. Call it the duality of Gemini if you must, but honestly it is more that this climate does not encourage clothes wearing.

Anyway there is one small slave and Him on a couch catching up on Lost Girl... just in time for the fourth season. Honestly we need to have a better system for watching things, but our trouble is that we both hate getting to the end of an episode and having to wait until next week to find out what happens. Subsequently we wait until there is a season and sit down and watch it. Of course by then there are hours of a show to watch and limited time... Sighs as one said we need a better system.

Back to sitting on the couch... one of us naked, one of us still snuggled in His dressing gown. The man is a frog... plain and simple. Of course He takes cruel advantage of the nakedness by being a sadistic pain. Just when the show is getting interesting He turns around and says pinch a nipple for me. It's bad enough that He is distracting and causes pain, but he is too lazy to do the job himself. Pain by proxy is lazy isn't it?

Mind you it probably hurts less when one does it than Him...

Hmm...

Maybe the alternatives are worse...

Happy to do the work Master...

Honest J

Duly noted

What do you think is the most attractive outfit for a woman to wear to bed He asked out of the blue, while casually sipping a drink

Umm... an oven mitt one hazarded wildly. 

No, He said, sounding slightly exasperated that one wasn't playing the game properly.

Naked?

Nope

Oooh, oooh, it's one of those nighties you see with the cute animals and saccharine slogans on them.

Er... no. The only people who like them are women He said, sounding slightly repulsed.

Tiring of the guessing game one conceded to having no idea.

It's two piece pyjamas He replied. 

The look of disbelief must have been evident in the furrowed brow one turned in His direction. Why?

Men consider them cute He said, sounding more than a little bemused as well. They don't want sexy or frills or even naked.

In what fucking universe are PJ's sexy?

I don't know He said sounding mournful. And I don't know what was wrong with the men who answered the survey that came up with those results either.

Well one is prepared to buy some. We can experiment...

Well don't spend too much on them He said. I'd hate for you to waste money on something that is probably going to end up on the floor destroyed.

You know one could be wrong here, but one deeply suspects that the destruction is not going to be brought about by the throes of passion.
Mutters at least not positive sexual kind...