Monday, December 23, 2013

Ice-cream, you scream, we all...

Mostly throw our hands up in the air one suspects. Err... this post has nothing to do with BDSM in case you hadn't realised this by now. This is actually about ice-cream and no there is no splodging involved. Due to the gluten intolerance one is now having difficulty getting enough calories in on the free day, so one turned to that old and faithful friend of those trying to bulk up... ice-cream.

There was just one tiny problem... somewhere along the line ice-cream is no longer constituted of heavy cream and a few flavours, but is now full of additives like soy and wheat. So why not make one's own? Subsequently an ice-cream maker is sitting under the tree down at His mother's end of the house. It was one of those many trips we were sent out for due to that broken pelvis she is sporting... still... those things take a long time to heal... but one does digress.

Deciding to not spend $500 on one (see how fiscally responsible one can be with other's money?) we opted for a base model thinking well if this turns out a regular fixture in our lives, we will lash out on one with a compressor next time. Sneaking into the box to retrieve instructions and recipes one fled down our end to peruse in peace. And that was where it started to get complicated.

See all the advertising says treats in 25 minutes. What they don't tell you is that the internal bowl needs to go in the freezer for 24 hours before hand... fair enough it doesn't have a compressor... or that you need to mix all the ingredients, with a blender, in another bowl and then transfer it to the machine where it will be for the aforementioned 25 minutes. A process that will render soft serve! If you want real ice-cream it then needs to go into the freezer for a couple of hours.

They also don't mention that internal bowl is huge. It takes up nearly a quarter of the freezer space in a modern fridge. One speaks from experience here as the purple... not a word from the peanut gallery... beast looms in there in its protective plastic bag so that it doesn't get freezer burn. And let us not dwell on the two hours the damn strawberries need to macerate in sugar and lemon juice before being added to the ice-cream.

So let's see...
24 hours for freezing the bowl
2 hours for maceration
10 20 minutes for mixing ingredients
25 minutes for chilling
2 hours for freezing the results
And a whole lot of washing up

Hmm... we seem to be a little off the 25 minutes here people
All one can say is that it better be the best strawberry ice-cream... ever!
Otherwise this could be the most underutilised Christmas present... ever!

6 comments:

ancilla_ksst said...

Wow, that was a lot of work! You might try Breyers ice cream if you have it there. I think the ingredient list is short and sweet.

ancilla_ksst said...

http://www.breyers.com/product/detail/113591/natural-vanilla

It is good stuff. It also comes in lactose free vanilla, so that is the only kind I eat.

little monkey said...

At least the pink of the strawberry mixture will color coordinate so well with the (cough) purple appliance.

Master's piece said...

@ancilla_ksst No such luck. There is one brand that the local whole food store stocks, but it is made out of coconut. Ideal for the lactose intolerant amongst us... like oneself, but one can do a small amount of things like ice-cream providing that one doesn't overdo it... but it doesn't have that high carb and fat rating that one is after. Besides, coconut ice-cream? Where's the fun in that?

@Ignores the little monkey throwing peanuts :P

ancilla_ksst said...

It just struck me now(maybe because it is too early in the am to be awake on a holiday) as a little ironic that the only flavor of ice cream I eat is vanilla.

Breyers is a major brand here- the regular (non whole) food stores sell it.

Master's piece said...

There is nothing nicer than a good vanilla bean ice-cream. It will be the next one after the chocolate flavour. That one is essentially a chocolate egg custard that is frozen. Thought one might add a few kirsch soaked cherries and some brownie crumbs in part of the batch and make a black forest ice-cream.