Friday, August 19, 2011

Conversations down the rabbit hole

You know your arse felt very good without the lube He remarked conversationally over his breakfast. Oh good one replied, 'cos that is the last time you will experience that... ever... you broke something. He paused mid bite of his steak and salad... well it was our morning and technically his evening. If you think that is bad, you should have been the one cooking it with a migraine... the smell of blood... ugh! Anyway one digresses...

You know that scene where the person claps their hand over their mouth and exclaims OMG while looking mortified? Yeah that one... that was totally what was going on inside. Seeing the look fluttering across one's face He smiled. That nasty, smug Scorpio smile that makes your insides go all squishy. Fortunately that medication was working, which is why He was home early again, and one was safe... for now. That is not going to go well for the future one fears L

Now you might think one would get smarter over time, but one is here to tell you... that is not the case. Though one does have a working theory as to what goes wrong. Wearing a collar makes you lose IQ points over time. It is the only explanation for the attrition of the capacity for self preservation. You get so used to telling the truth, it all just slips out. Nods its all the collars fault...

Later in the day He says will you get me a glass of milk? Umm... no, one replied from the comfort of being snuggled up in His arms. His heart actually missed a beat... one could feel it via the ear pressed up against his chest... and that thing beats with way more precision than one's own ever will achieve. Umm... that was a question right? It went up at the end... that signifies a question. Right? Right?

Apparently not... It seems there are two ways and one small slaves way is not the right one. And one did ask for clarification on that point. You know... just in case He was wrong. It seems that is not an option under His system. It hardly seems fair...

1 comment:

Storm said...

It's the collar, if only I had known! It's to late for me *sigh, but maybe some poor soul will read this and think twice before the damn thing snaps closed. I think this post is a public service announcement lol.