Friday, February 1, 2013

More things

There are lots of things one doesn't understand... and probably never will... and Fet is often the wellspring of that lack of comprehension. All over Fet there are discussions about polyamorous relationships and it is only a matter of minutes before someone pipes up to say oh that isn't for me. And they are usually quite vehement in their statements, not to mention dismissive of the possibility. To be honest one never quite understands why they are so adamant... considering they have never tried it.

Oh one gets that you don't have to try something to know that you won't like it. The thing is though we are often wrong in those initial judgements and we are capable of change. Hell how many of us hated certain vegetables as a child only to embrace them later on as adults. No, the thing that one doesn't understand is why we aren't open to giving it a go. Somewhere along the line one suspects it is because we have all these little bits of social programming.

Unlike vegetables which we know are good for us... deep down we know it even if they do taste funky... sexual relationships aren't something we regard like that at all. We are taught that sex is supposed to be with someone we care deeply about; we are supposed to wait for that special someone because somewhere out there is our soul mate. The thing is though all over the net there are those waiting... often with dogged determination... to find their perfect mate. When in reality it is more that there is someone who is perfect for right now 'cos let's be honest, some of the best lessons we learn are from those who wander through our lives rather than make camp.

That's not to say everyone should wiz out and try a poly relationship. Hell, there are plenty of people who barely have the relationship skills to maintain the relationship they have, without adding someone else.  No this is more a musing on why we don't stay open to the possibilities. After all that was how we tried broccoli and squid and seaweed and snails and offal and...


ancilla_ksst said...

I suspect it is a few things- One-the fear that he will like the other one better and abandon the person making the statement.
Two- the fear that he will like the other better and always be making comparisons, ie. why don't you act/look/suck cock like she does?
Three- the fear that the other person will take up his time and one will be left taking up knitting or watching CSI alone every evening.
Not to mention having to write out three names on return address labels and Christmas cards. Such a pain that would be. Ok, maybe not so much the last one.

Master's piece said...

So you're saying you think it is fear? :D

ancilla_ksst said...


Kitty for Mr. Woods said...

Id agree that its the fear, but the fear stems from insecurity. The thought of him being with someone else turns my stomach, but hes perfectly happy letting me be with others.