Thursday, August 15, 2013

Back on the wagon

The strange thing about diet and exercise is that the minion of Satan, otherwise known as the scales, doesn't always tell the whole truth. In fact the damn thing lies. On this diet one has often put on weight or not lost weight at all while still losing inches. A distressing state that He has not experienced... which is damned annoying to one small and slightly competitive slave might one add.

All along though, one has said that the only things that tell the truth are your clothes. Those little fuckers never tell a lie... its part of their rigid nature one suspects. He used to look at one as though slightly insane, but he does that regularly. Personally one thought just you wait and see. Eventually you will reach the point where the scales don't give you the gratification that you seek... particularly when you hit the end of the diet and your body does that strange thing where it seems to redistribute your existing weight into muscle and other odd places.

Like some malign seer one's predictions came true. Satan's minion stopped whispering sweet things in His ear and stopped giving him the gratification that he craved. Oh He was still losing weight, you could see it in the way his t-shirts were hanging, it just wasn't translating into weight loss. Eventually He started to realise that one was... not right per se... more that one wasn't wrong. Whispers He's Scorpio, very Scorpio J

Anyway the plan on this holiday was that we were going to be very, very good. It was the last few weeks of the diet and we wanted to nail it... so to speak. Besides we figured without our physically active jobs we would need to go to the gym regularly at least. Of course most of the plan went awry... as they so often do. We weren't particularly bad... it's just that we weren't particularly good.

Of late His clothes have been telling him unpleasant things. So girding his loins He got back on the scales. For once Satan's minion concurred with the clothes. Well of course they would... after all they are evil. So we are back on the wagon... well more running along side of it.
And you know for the record...
That run hurt everything... including the pride L


Sarah said...

Lol. Tis made me laugh because I've had the same thoughts!!
I know you work,out, but what is your diet like?

Master's piece said...

Oh if you look at the top of the page you will see a tab marked deviant dining. It is a rough outline of what's served down the hole :D