Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Mirror, mirror

Peering in the mirror with a mild sense of dissatisfaction one turned and said the trouble with working out is you start to notice how asymmetrical a body is. He gave that blank look that women, regardless of relationship style, recognise. It is the one that says why are you talking in tongues? So with resigned patience one pointed out to Him that one side of the hips are noticeably higher than the other. He repeated the blank look. OFFS come here to the mirror.

He dutifully trotted over with the other look women the world over recognise. It was the look of it will just be easier to humour the mad woman. After one carefully pointed out the issue He repeated the blank look with a puzzled frown wrinkling the forehead... and the sideways look that signals He is obviously talking to a completely irrational person. And then it clicked why we were having a communication issue.

Not only was one standing there naked, but there was a bald pussy between the hips. So the process was going something like this; look at one hip, eyes move to the right and hit the pussy. Pause... now what was she saying... oh right... the hip. Eyes go to the other hip. By which time there is no memory of the original hip at all. See the truth of the matter is that men and women do not see a naked body the same way at all.

Women have a tendency to look at body parts in a disconnected from the whole kind of way. We run a critical eye over each part individually. Men on the other hand seem to see the whole. And if it is naked, they see the whole in terms of potential. And frankly the closer they seem to be to the naked whole, the less they tend to be critical. The obvious solution to this is that one needs to wear clothes more often... that should work.


Dina said...

You know I'm a pedant and so I'm just going to remind you that the only perfectly symmetrical people in the world are those with Down Syndrome. This is why the look "off" to the rest of us.

So, yanno--quit your beeyatchin'. :p

littlemonkey said...

I was going to make a comment, but I read Dina's and I laughed so hard, all the thoughts flew right out of my brain.

Dina said...

~grins, bowing left and right~

I'm here all week.

Master's piece said...

Show stealing bitch... what are you doing still awake?

Dina said...

Why, stealing your thunder, of course. :D