Substitute

Out grocery shopping the other day one was happily engaged in apple selection when one glanced up to see Him fossicking in vegetables. It gave one an uneasy pause. He looked at one across the bins and noticing one had assumed a pose that probably resembled a prairie dog, a smirk flitted across his face. None of which allayed the sense of unease that was emanating from a certain part of the anatomy.

Scampering to join Him the heart sank when the worst fears were confirmed. He was handling cucumbers... and not in same way a cook does. Finally He selected one and popped it in the shopping trolley. It is amazing, but when one goes looking for a decent sized cucumber there is never one to be found. Unfortunately He didn’t seem to have encountered that problem at all... in fact the damned thing looked like it had been pumped with growth hormones L

Now you are probably wondering what this has to do with the knickers shot aren’t you. Well for the odd ghoul and ghouleh (yes they are gender specific) amongst you, it’s your substitute. Unfortunately when we hopped into bed... one of us with more trepidation that the other... we realised He was actually shattered and at that moment one’s blood pressure decided to take a nose dive. The end result was the two of us laying there making vague commitments to next week.

 Wonder if He would like to curl up in the car while one does the grocery shopping for the week... and more importantly... does anyone have a recipe that needs an enormous cucumber?